uber_deutsch

http://kenlevine.blogspot.com/2009/11/chuckles-bites-dust.html

I imagine you've probably already seen it (many maybe times)but it's sure worth seeing again. This is David Lloyd's classic MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW episode, "Chuckles Bites the Dust". I've seen it forty times. I still marvel.

As most of you know, we throw a once a year Orphan's Thanksgiving Party.
It started out with a mere 14 people gathered in our living room.
The following year, it was 33.
Then it exploded into 62 people.

While it is fun, and I can justify the expense of it saying "Oh, it's only once a year!"... this year alas our finances are a wee bit on the strained side and we've decided to severely limit the numbers to the virtual "LA type family only". This meaning people that we hang out with one on one on a regular basis vs people we see more in group settings.

Boooo! Oh well, hopefully next year after we catch up a bit.

Stolen shamelessly from blergeatkitty

Poll #1484951
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 9

Who would you rather have trying to kill you?

Who would you rather have a beer with? (Assume they're not going to try and kill you while you have the beer.)

I feel like I could outrun, outwit, and outlast Jason out here in the real world. I don't have that much control over my dreams, though, and boy do I love to sleep. I would not last long trying not to sleep, and my dreams totally mess with my emotions (I'll be mad at Or in real life if he cheats on me in a dream. Because I'm lame). So, yeah, I trust awake Rose with survival more than I trust asleep Rose.

As for the beer, Jason doesn't say much, whereas Freddy says the most ridiculous shit when he's trying to kill you, so yeah, Freddy would be a riot and a half. Sign me up for that class.

So, I follow @adamcarolla on Twitter now, and every time he tweets that they're taking calls I think about calling in to talk about Sky blowing him.

But I won't, because that's just creepy.

http://kenlevine.blogspot.com/2009/11/everything-you-wanted-to-know-about-syd.html

As I head off to do another SITCOM ROOM seminar, here are a few Friday Q’s and even A’s:

From Sammy Glick (I love THAT name):

Who is Syd Field and what prompted him to write screenplay instructional books? Do you know of anyone who read the book and went on to write a successful screenplay? What did would be screenwriters do before Syd published his book(s)?

Of all the how-to screenwriting books, his have risen to the top. Not sure what he did before. He doesn’t have a lot of credits. Now he teaches at USC and Harvard and makes a shitload of money conducting seminars.

His three-act structure for screenplays is very sound. If you’re looking for a book on the subject, it’s as good or better than any of the others out there. Certainly better than those goofy “How to Write a Screenplay in Eleven Minutes” books.

According to Field’s website there have been a number of former students who have gone on to write successful movies including John Singleton, Kevin Williamson, and Randi Singer just to list three (of the six).

One word of caution: This goes for all screenwriting books. Use them as guides not the gospel. You do need sound structure but don’t slavishly squeeze your vision into one format.

unkystan has a TONY RANDALL SHOW question:

I was wondering why Devon Scott was replaced by Penny Peyser for season two.

Honestly, CBS wanted someone more attractive. Now usually the trade-off is looks for acting ability but I have to say, with no disrespect to Devon, that in this case Penny was better and funnier.

From leor:

This year, Rob Thomas remade his show Cupid, and although that didn't work, do you think a show like Almost Perfect could be more successful if remade now, with perhaps a more sophisticated audience (if you believe that to be the case in the first place)? And would you ever want to revisit a previous effort that you were proud of and felt didn't get a good enough chance?

Actually, Robin Schiff, David Isaacs and I tossed around the idea of rebooting ALMOST PERFECT but it’s a very hard sell. Networks would much rather try something new. We also wondered if it would be as timely now as when it premiered in 1995. A highly successful career woman trying to balance work and a personal life was novel back then. This was even a few years before ALLY MCBEAL. Now there are any number of them.

The other problem for us was casting. Nancy Travis was just so wonderful and special in the role it’s hard to imagine anyone else playing that part. You spoiled us, Nancy, damn you!

There are a couple of unproduced pilots from our checkered past I’d love to see get another shot. I’d also like a subway on the Westside of Los Angeles.

And finally: From Alan Coil:

In regards to the number of writers on a movie (as opposed to a television series), I'm generally of the opinion that a movie with a large number of writers is likely to be a bad movie.

Does this seem to be true, or am I making a generalization based on anecdotal information?

More often than not it is true. There have been exceptions but what you usually end up getting is a mish-mash of styles. And if a LOT of writers are involved that generally means the script is in trouble.

What you lose is a singular voice and vision. You can argue that writers assigned to rewrite are better and more experienced than the original writers and in many cases this is true. Especially when a studio buys a spec. But ultimately, when is art by committee ever much better?

What’s your question?

It's not just that I have trouble remembering.

Some mornings I'll see my stick of deodorant, but I'll think to myself "I don't need to wear deodorant today."

Then, around 11am, I'll start wondering who is eating a deli sandwich. Oh, no wait, that's my right armpit (it smells about 3x as strong as the left).

And then I'll use my work deodorant.

Okay, sometimes I don't smell myself, and then I wander around stinking.

I just thought I'd share.

So... remember that girl yesterday in love with Orchids and wanted 45 CPs?
Suffice to say, I'm a little to expensive for her. Even when I dropped the quote by 2K.

Wanna know what her budget is? $1,500.
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA !!!!!

Uh... yeah.

Here's the follow up email I sent her to explain why she's been getting some of the price quotes she's been getting.

( email )

http://kenlevine.blogspot.com/2009/11/directing-in-new-york.html

Directing multi-camera shows can be a challenge in the best of conditions but in New York, it can really be a test.

A number of years ago I directed several episodes of LATELINE for NBC in New York. It starred now-Senator Al Franken and was filmed at the Kaufman-Astoria Studios in Queens. We were on the stage next to SESAME STREET. Maria is really hot... but I digress.

Multi-camera shows are generally on five-day schedules. The first day is the table reading and maybe a little rehearsing. The next two days are rehearsing with just the actors. The fourth day the full crew arrives and you do the camera blocking. And then the fifth day you rehearse with cameras and shoot the show that night.

Shows are either on a Monday through Friday schedule or Wednesday through Tuesday. I prefer the latter and explain why in this post from my dusty archives.

LATELINE was on that Wednesday to Tuesday schedule. Usually, you finish shooting a show on Tuesday night and a crew comes in and strikes the swing sets during the middle of the night. When you arrive on Wednesday the new sets for that week’s show are already going up.

Not in New York.

We’d finish Tuesday night and then Wednesday afternoon a crew would wander in to swap out the sets. This pretty much obliterated any rehearsal. I said to the line producer, “Don’t you have crews in New York that can strike sets in the middle of the night?” He said ominously, “Yes. But trust me, you don’t want ‘em.”

O-kay.

To get around this I just didn’t rehearse on Wednesdays. We did the table reading and I sent the actors home and made up the time on Thursday.

One week however we got Allison Janney to guest-star. This was before WEST WING. She was just a very highly respected theater actress then (which isn’t exactly chopped liver). We were thrilled that she accepted the part but had one proviso. She had a prior commitment for Thursday she couldn’t get out of. We said, no problem, we’ll just rehearse on Wednesday instead.

So after the table reading we get down to the stage at about noon. Soon after the striking crew arrives. In order to get the sets in and out they had to open the big stage door. That’s usually not a big issue in Hollywood because you’re on a movie lot. But here you’re on a city street.

The huge door is rolled open and now we’re basically rehearsing in a loud construction site on a street in Queens, right across from a Gyro restaurant, dry cleaners, and lamp repair shop.

And this is November. It’s like a giant Nor’ Easter blew in.

So picture the scene. We’re all rehearsing in parkas and gloves. Noisy crew guys are hammering and banging and crashing into things, wheeling sets in and out, and yelling instructions to each other. And passersby are watching. A few really curious spectators decide to just enter the stage and stand behind me as I try to block the scenes.

When we got to the scene where Allison was supposed to seduce Al and they looked like two Eskimos clinging to each other during a blizzard I called a wrap.

And then to top it off, one of the spectators was annoyed and said to me, “Hey, is that it?”

I love New York. But there are times I greatly prefer Culver City.

I just quoted someone $8,490.00 to do their wedding flowers.
I don't really plan on lowering that price


No, that number above was not a typo. Wow.

1. Find a dentist
2. Put cushions on the storage area in my office
3. Paint office
4. Hang art in office
5. Hang other blinds in office
6. Start running again
7. Build garden beds
8. Plant garden
9. Tear up grass on North side of driveway
10. Plant rose bushes on north side of driveway
11. Find cool thing to do with street-facing garage wall
12. Organize garage
13. Find out if we have hardwood under the carpet
14. Knock down wall
15. redo kitchen
16. Paint other walls
17. Acquire some type of shade for back patio
18. Fix/replace rain gutters
19. Build planter boxes for area in front of porch
20. Trim tree in front yard
21. Pick and plant trees in back yard

That's a good plan for now.

http://kenlevine.blogspot.com/2009/11/in-memory-of-david-lloyd.html

In the famous “Chuckles Bites the Dust” episode of THE MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW, Lou and Murray and Sue Ann just can’t stop laughing at the absurd circumstances that led to their clown colleague’s death. At one point Murray asks why they laugh and Lou elegantly responds:

It's a release, Murray. A kind of defense mechanism. It's like whistling in a graveyard. You try to make light of something because it scares you. We laugh at death because we know death will have the last laugh on us.

The man who wrote that passed away himself this morning. David Lloyd has died after a long illness. He was a true giant in the industry and one of the major influences on our career (me and my partner, David Isaacs). Proud to say we received our first rejection letter from David Lloyd. Seven years later we would work together on CHEERS and I mentioned that to him. He was very apologetic. I think his exact words were: “Then I’m sure the script was a piece of shit.”

We wound up working with him for twenty years. Most of what I learned about rewriting and pitching in a room I learned from observing David Lloyd. There’s never been anybody like him. He was a cyclone. Once a week, on his night to consult, he’d sweep into the room (wearing his customary white shirt with red pin stripes) and completely dominate it. Always bringing positive energy, very strong opinions (about EVERYTHING), hilarious anecdotes, and the jokes that would get the best laughs in the show.

He was so bright, and so fast. The show runner would say, “We need a joke here for…” and bam! David would have it before he finished his sentence. He was awe-inspiring and I don’t mind saying – intimidating as hell! If you pitched a bad joke, duck!

So you learned to pitch good jokes. He made you better.

And room writing wasn’t even his best act. David Lloyd also wrote the best first drafts. Normally when a writer turns in a first draft the staff rewrites it to a varying degree. Not David’s. You sent his right down to the stage. When you see a David Lloyd writing credit on THE MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW, THE BOB NEWHART SHOW, THE TONY RANDALL SHOW, THE ASSOCIATES, RHODA, PHYLLIS, CHEERS, TAXI, FRASIER, LOU GRANT, BEST OF THE WEST, AMEN, or WINGS you are seeing his original work.

Story meetings with David were unique. Generally the staff and writer pitch out ideas and eventually cobble together a story. The writer takes extensive notes, goes home, and writes the outline. David kept no notes. Ever. Even with a million thoughts flying around. He’d come back three days later with an outline that contained every detail. Contrast that with David and me. Even taking furious notes we still taped the story meetings because invariably we would forget or miss something important. David Lloyd kept it all in his head.

And his outlines themselves were a thing to behold. No other CHEERS writer that I know could get away ending a scene by saying, “Carla says something really crass and stupid here and we move on before the audience hates her.”

David Lloyd attended Yale where he was classmates with such notables as Dick Cavett and Richard Maltby Jr.. He went on to write for Jack Paar, Dick Cavett, and the TONIGHT SHOW. Legend has it (a legend perpetuated by him) that he wanted to come out to California so he dashed off a spec MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW without ever having seen the show and he sold it. And throughout his entire sitcom career he never had an agent. He negotiated his own deals. Like I said, there was no one like him.

He had a passion for the finer things – art, literature, wine, model trains. He was the Algonquin Round Table but funnier and more caustic.

The first sitcom filming my partner and I ever attended was a MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW. It just happened to be “Chuckles Bites the Dust”. We walked out of there in awe. I remember saying, “Do you think we could ever write anything that good?” and David answered, “No one can.”

He was right.

I go back to that classic funeral scene. As the preacher is delivering a eulogy Mary begins stifling laughs. The preacher spots her, asks her to stand, and says this:

You feel like laughing, don't you? Don't try to stop yourself. Go ahead. Laugh out loud. Don't you see? Nothing could have made Chuckles the happier. He lived to make people laugh. He found tears offensive. He hated to see people cry. Go ahead, my dear -- laugh.

As Mary (and everyone who ever knew and was touched by him) bursts into tears, we:

FADE OUT.

Here is a link to the script of “Chuckles Bites the Dust”. See for yourself the brilliance that was David Lloyd.

Every now and then I like to give props to applications that particularly enhance my life. I've leave out music-related software, as that's a more complex subject. I put a lot of weight on efficient and intuitive user interfaces, and my selections reflect that priority.

Things. I've tried a number of task managers in my life, and this is hands-down the best I've ever seen on any platform. It lacks the depth of some other programs, but makes up for it with a beautiful and transparent user interface. Highest praise I can offer: Things actually makes me want to be more organized and productive. (A runner-up: OmniFocus).



OmniOutliner. Made by the people behind the aforementioned runner-up. This is the most versatile software organizational tool I know. It's perfect for any data organized in a hierarchy - outlines, lists, notes, and so on. You can add columns and use it as a more elegant sort of spreadsheet, or shallow database. I use this app all the time, in countless different ways. There are five or so OmniFocus documents on my Finder desktop right now, each for different purposes. It's also dirt cheap.

Billings. An elegant program for managing invoicing. Just the thing for a freelancer. A very useful supplement to a general finance program. Speaking of which...

Mint.com webware. Quicken has been bloatware for years, and the Mac platform offers only half-hearted substitutes. Along comes this beautiful, if somewhat overly structured, cloud solution. What it lacks in flexibility (at the moment) it easily makes up for in automaticity and thoughtful interface ergonomics. And it's free!

http://kenlevine.blogspot.com/2009/11/one-of-those-great-hollywood-stories.html

Looking forward to the Sitcom Room seminar this weekend. It’s for would-be writers not looking for short cuts. As opposed to this story:

I was a Story Editor on MASH and was invited to speak to a sitcom writing class at UCLA along with my friend Larry, who at the time was a Story Editor on RHODA. We talked about how to break into the business – the importance of writing great spec scripts. Do’s and don’ts (a lot of which I’ll be discussing this weekend although writing a spec BARNEY MILLER is no longer a “do”.)

We stressed the need for hard work, really studying the shows, setting high standards for yourself. That was the path to a script assignment for one of our shows.

A friend of mine was in the class and overheard the following:

Two coeds talking. Near the end of our discussion one turned to the other.

COED #1: So what do you think, Ken or Larry?

COED #2 (after some consideration): I’ll fuck Larry. I’d rather get a RHODA.

Postscript: Neither of us got lucky that night. And she never got a RHODA. But it was nice to know the students really were taking our career advice seriously.

My brother Sky has always been a big fan of Adam Carolla. He listens to his podcasts pretty regularly, and listened to his radio show before that. At some point, I thought Sky said that if he were to have to blow a guy, it would be Adam Carolla. Sky claims that *I* said this, and just attributed it to him. Anyway, it became part of the Sky-Rose lexicon.

So, last night we go out to see The Dan Band (you may have seen then in The Hangover or Old School). It was a great show. As we were leaving, Valerie says "hey, isn't that Adam Carolla." Or has had one drink, and is in a great mood because the show was so good. So, he walks up, taps on Adam's shoulder, and says "Excuse me, Adam? I don't mean to bother you, but my friend over here is a big fan. In fact, he says that if he had to suck a man-dick, he would suck yours."... Read More

Adam made a point to say that "man-dick" wasn't nec'y, and you could just say "dick." Then we talked about she-males and horse dicks. He had to go to the bathroom, so we let him leave.

The End.